1 Corinthians 2:9

"What no eye has seen, nor ear heard, nor the heart of man imagined, what God has prepared for those who love him." 

During college, this was my theme verse. I even had it made into a vinyl quote for my wall. These words speak to the unknown, the new, the unfolding that is college. This verse thrilled me. NO TELLING what God was going to do next. I was sure it would be good.

One evening, I was visiting with a friend at Starbucks and we were discussing this very verse. A man (who happened to be a pastor) overheard our conversation.

"Do you know the next verse, though?" He asked us. "It completes verse 9."

Surprised anyone was listening, we stammered out some response. It was a long time ago and unfortunately I don't really remember what was said. But He smiled kindly and left soon after that.

Fast forward several years to today and I now have a teensy bit more understanding how verses 9 and 10 work together.

“What no eye has seen, nor ear heard, nor the heart of man imagined, what God has prepared for those who love him”— these things God has revealed to us through the Spirit. For the Spirit searches everything, even the depths of God.

See, the unknown and the unfolding are a little less thrilling than they were 5 years ago, because now I realize even more that tragedies can be the next thing around a corner, rather than a triumph. Sometimes what unfolds isn't in our plans. The "not knowing" has lost a little appeal.

But in verse 10, God is promising that he can bring understanding to our spirits through His spirit. Understanding that I need and crave at every twist and turn in the path.

While I still haven't opened my Bible to find a 5-year, or even a 1-year plan yet (I'll let you know if I do), I understand a bit more than a few years ago the beauty of when God reveals things to our spirits.

So to the eavesdropping pastor out there somewhere: you were right. Verses 9 and 10 go hand-in-hand.

Saul's Problem

I am reading through the Bible chronologically again this year and as I've recently read the story of Saul's reign and downfall throughout the book of 1 Samuel, it seemed for the first time that I could pinpoint his problem.

He was wise in his own eyes.

Consistently, he demonstrated impatience over patience, taking matters into his own hands over waiting on God's timing and walking in the wisdom of Saul, rather than the wisdom of God.

Scary.place.to.be.

He didn't wait for Samuel to sacrifice to God, he chose to go to a witch for wisdom, he wasted time and energy pursuing David to satisfy his own ego and ultimately decided to write the end of his own story when he takes his own life.

God had great things planned for Saul- not only was he king, his sons and their sons after them were supposed to be king. But Saul threw that opportunity in the trash with his very own hands.

It's easy to judge Saul from our armchairs, but how often do we ourselves default to walking in the wisdom of self? Far too often would be my guess. I know I'm guilty of it!

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him,  and he will make your paths straight. Do not be wise in your own eyes;  fear the Lord and shun evil. This will bring health to your body and nourishment to your bones." 
Proverbs 3:5-8 (NIV)

Friends, let us learn from Saul's mistakes and choose to walk in God's wisdom and wait on his timing. We won't be disappointed.

In the Beginning was The Word

"In the beginning was the Word, and the word was with God and the Word was God." John 1:1

The Word.

Out of all the ways John could have started his gospel, this is certainly one of the more unique ways. He passes over the typical genealogical or cultural stage setting and reaches back to the beginning, the Very Beginning, invoking a Genesis-type intro to the last of the Gospels.

The Word. The Word.

In the beginning was the Word.

What does that mean and why did John choose those words to open his beautiful and unique Gospel?

In the HCSB version of John 1:1, the footnote says "The Word (In the Greek: Logos) is a title for Jesus as the communication and the revealer of God the Father."

Communication and revealer. I love that. My spirit literally went "Aha!"

Sure I have memorized this scripture, but I don't think I've ever really let the gravity of these words saturate my soul. Jesus communicated and revealed to us who God is through His time here on earth, as the written word (The Bible) continues to do so across the centuries.

I don't remember a time where I wasn't surrounded by words. My parents and grandparents read to me constantly as a kid and I was reading on my own by the end of kindergarten. I have always had tons of books and my eyes hungrily search for words as I eat or do other activities. I like word-decorated items, word games, play on words and word humor.

Words are my JAM.

God is leading me into a season of life where (prayerfully) words are going to play a bigger part. I have found myself asking myself why writing is important to me or why it's a big deal at all. There are so many books, blogs and magazines out there already. How are more words going to even matter?

He then brought John 1:1 to my mind.

Words matter. Words have power. Jesus himself is the Word.

As a Christian, God has called me to use my words (His words) to communicate and reveal who Jesus is. That's it. That's my job. We all have this responsibility by being his witnesses, but for me, this specifically applies to writing.

It doesn't matter (really) what direction my writing takes, what does matter is that I walk in obedience to the calling He has placed in my life.

It Was the Last of Times, It Was the First of Times

Hello readers,

This is Samantha Hanni, the writer formerly known as Samantha Maloy. I would've blogged sooner, but it's later...so whatever. In case you hadn't heard...

I am now a wife!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I have a husband!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wedding photography featured in this post by Valerie Sebestyen.
Check out my or her FB page for the complete album.

And I couldn't be more thrilled, contented, or excited.

Where do I begin? The week leading up to the wedding proceeded smoothly, all things considered. But nearly everyday brought the poignant thought of "This is the last time that..."

The week that never was close, never seemed like it was going to happen was right here: happening, rushing over and past me in a wave that I couldn't control.

However, I did my best to soak in the water from the wedding wave (or hurricane. or tsunami. K never mind that's being dramatic.) and I loved and felt that week more deeply than I thought was possible.

As you can see, the long awaited day started for me bright and early! After that, I don't remember much... except that we got hitched!

No, for real...the day appeared, existed, then vanished.

The day went incredibly smooth though (at least it seemed like that...if there are conflicting stories, please keep those to yourself! Haha.) Many many thanks for all who helped it run so smoothly. Your thank you card will be arriving soon in the mail. I promise!!

Then we were on our own. Finally. Just ourselves, headed to relax in the Florida Keys for a whole week.

Pigeon Key

Reppin' Shimmers in the Atlantic Ocean! 

I don't even know...

Marker 88 Restaurant

Outside our resort

Shark Valley- Everglades

Photographing a cute little lizard 

Self-explanatory

Random signs I found amusing

.together.

By the end of the week, we were both ready to be back in our lovely Oklahoma and start living life again, but living it together. Just two weeks before had been a week of lasts. Now it was a week of firsts. First time to go to the grocery store, first time to plan and cook meals -all by myself!- first time for Kurtis to come home to me, first time to make our bed, first time to come home together after a Thunder game, first first first!

Everything we have planned, prayed and dreamed about, we are living out now, with more and more to come. I can already say it is a beautiful, restoring, challenging journey.

We aren't perfect, but I can say this without a doubt: Kurtis was created to be a husband and I was created to be a wife.  It is an energizing, powerful thing to be living out the role you were created for. Glory to our Creator, and the One who holds our lives and marriage in His hands.

Sincerely,
Mrs. Hanni

Are You Happy With Now?

What if you were completely satisfied with this moment right now?

I started thinking last night how much of our time and energy is spent in anticipation of:

the weekend
next month
November 3 (Oh wait, I think that's just me...)
a different season
freshman year
senior year
another year
another time
another place.

There is nothing inherently wrong with this kind of thinking; anticipation can be good. Planning is necessary.

But are you able to set all that aside as needed and be genuinely satisfied with the present?

If yes, great. You don't have to finish reading this post.
If not, let's chat a bit more.

Truthfully, I'm preaching to myself right now. Truthfully, I am living in GREAT anticipation for that November 3 date when my fiance and I will finally be man and wife, and there is nothing wrong with that. Truthfully, I did not expect it to be so hard to be satisfied with my here and now, and that struggle is refining me.

So I go back to God's Word. Psalm 118:24 says, "THIS is the day that the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it."

I cannot dismiss the utter gift that right now is, because it will never happen again. There is much to do, much to say, much to listen to, much to be each day. Jim Elliot once said, "Wherever you are, be all there." Be all here. In this day. THIS day. Not 2 weeks from now. Not next month. Not 2 months from now. Not 5 years from now.


 I encourage you all, as I am firmly encouraging myself, to finish drinking all now has to offer before moving on to...

...whatever's next.

"Let not our longing slay our appetite for living."

--- Jim Elliot



It Won't Be Taken Away

In today's selection from Jesus Calling, a scripture resonated with me in a way that it hadn't before.

"...You have chosen the better thing and it will not be taken away from you."

This scripture is Luke 10:42 and is referring to the story of Mary and Martha. Jesus was commenting on Mary's choice to commune with Him and how that wouldn't be taken from her.
The devo today talked about the rewards of choosing to commune with God even though sometimes it is not appreciated or even misunderstood by others, like in the story of Mary and Martha. God promises returns when we choose Him, and those rewards are not to be taken away.

This hit home with me as recently I found out that my internship will not pan out how I desired. I enjoyed the work, was very good at it and have received excellent feedback from my immediate superiors. For reasons beyond my control and theirs, it just simply isn't going to pan out beyond the end of July.

A choice is before me: blare my "I'm discouraged" horn (and in this case, I would have good reason to) or hum a different tune.
As we all know, throughout our lives there are seemingly worthwhile ventures that we invest ourselves in and seemingly get nothing. They are "taken away from us," so to speak. It is an encouraging reminder as God's kids that no matter what endeavors in our lives fail to bring returns or are taken away from us, those daily decisions to commune with Him, the hourly decisions to choose HIM over all, will never fail to reward and it can't be taken away from us. I like that kind of security. That's just how it works in God's economy.

God's economy > any other economy.

A Huge Gaping Abyss

Here is another devo from the vault! I wrote this Aug/Sept of my freshman year in college. I have grown a lot in the area of trusting God with my future since then, but thought it would be cool to post this before my LAST WEEK of regular classes (maybe ever?) starts up. 

Enjoy!

I recently attended a leadership orientation for my scholarship group.  As is typical with these types of orientations, we got to partake in a variety of icebreakers.  One such task, though relatively simple, proved amazingly hard for me. 

Picture this: you and your partner. Small balls on the ground.  Your partner directs you to the balls and you throw the balls to try to tag the other people out by listening to your partner’s instructions. 

Oh yeah, and you are blindfolded, as are the other people you are trying to tag. 

Since I went first, my partner actually had to lead me out of the room where we were meeting to the playing space outside.  Here is where I ran into my problem. 

I couldn’t see. 

I didn’t know what to expect next. 

Any step could be my last (okay, not really but just play along).  The next step could plunge me into a huge gaping abyss. 

Even with my partner leading me by the elbow and reassuring me I was on solid ground, I literally could not tell my legs to take bigger steps out to the yard.  I was taking little baby steps.  My partner eventually dragged me the rest of the way down the path.

Why would I be telling you this?

This is a message the Lord has been teaching me through a variety of circumstances.  Even if we can’t see or think one moment ahead, He has already been there and back again.  

Proverbs 20:24 says, “A man’s steps are directed by the Lord. How then can anyone understand his own way?” 

Why is it so hard to just let go and trust?  I was slightly appalled at how even though someone was telling me,”Hey, it’s okay, take bigger steps,” I absolutely refused to take bigger steps for fear of plummeting to the ground and making a fool of myself.

Can’t you just hear the Lord saying, “Hey, it’s okay. I am right here. Take bigger steps”?

Isaiah 43:1-2, Psalm 139:16, Proverbs 3:5-6

God Knows When You Sigh

A little something I wrote in October of 2010.

God knows when you sigh…and when you cry.

He knows if it was a gut-wrenching sob over a loved one that was taken from you. He knows if they were tears of joy.

He sees also if it’s a heart that is tearing in two that produces silent tears that trickle slowly down your face. He knows the deep longings that echo with soundless voices in your spirit. Longings that you cannot yourself voice.

He sees your shoulders sag and your eyes gaze off in the distance even though you smile and put on the “right” face when you talk with people. Longings that no one else knows about.

Tears hidden from the world. He sees them all.

And he keeps track of them.

That speaks of an incredibly intimate God. I have a hard time opening up to people. Up to a certain point, I’m friendly and open, but once certain lines are crossed, I shut the door. It is hard to trust myself to other people. But God is already there, already “nearer than breathing, nearer than hands in feet." (from Streams in the Desert, May 29 entry) Wow! You can’t get much closer than that!

There is relief in knowing that God knows the content and extent of my longings and desires. It is wonderful to be known. Open up your heart today to the Shepherd, to your Lover- and be known fully.

“…for the Lord has heard the sound of my weeping.” Psalm 6:8

“O Lord, all my longing is before you; my sighing is not hidden from you.” Psalm 38:9

“For he knows the secrets of the heart.” Psalm 44:21

“You have kept count of my tossings; put my tears in your bottle. Are they not in your book?” Psalm 56:8

“Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your heart before him…” Psalm 62:8

“But truly God has listened; he has attended to the voice of my prayer.” Psalm 66:19

“For he satisfies the longing soul, and the hungry soul he fills with good things.” Psalm 107:9

“For I will satisfy the weary soul, and every languishing soul I will replenish.” Jeremiah 31:25

The Forever

From a journal entry in December 2010, with some modifications :)

Always.

Forever. 

Our society really misuses these poor words. I mean, we don't really have other options. The English language didn't give us words to denote varying levels of a particular idea or sentiment, like other languages do.

I personally toss these words around without thinking about them.  How many times have you said or heard phrases like these?

"I was waiting for the doctor for forever today!" (Hmm...is 45 minutes more accurate?)

"Like, for real- I was in that line at Wal-Mart forevvaa!" (I think it was probably 10 minutes.)

"Ugh, I was stopped at the light for forever!" (Two minutes, really? Forever?)

Forever is used in these circumstances to denote how long they lasted. It can also be used to declare such unending pleasure in a particular activity as to wish away its unavoidable termination.

"Ohhh, I wish it was always Christmas break!"

"I could just sit here on the beach for forever!"

Etc., etc.

Using this as an example, Christmas Break cannot last forever- we must move on to the rest of our calendar. If it was break all the time, how would we know to enjoy it? There would not be anything significant to let us know that we could and should enjoy this restful period.

These trite phrases are traded fast and furious throughout the day. What got me started thinking about this was eternity and heaven, and how our lives there as Christians really are forever. Our lives there will never end.

Do we really know what always and forever means? Can our brains even process this concept?

Think of how bounded by time our world is, especially the Western world. Everything most definitely has an end.

We finish books, we complete a degree, we consume a meal, we arrive at our destination, the song ends, the party ends, our naps end, the movie ends, the story ends.

Yet in heaven, The End no longer has any relevance. What will that even be like?

Truth is, we don't know yet. We can't know, because our minds are still bounded by time. I'm ok with not fully comprehending yet. 

I'm no philosopher or theologian...I just was thinking, and wanted to get you all to do the same...

I'm So Thirsty!

Hi all!

I wanted to expand on my Facebook status from this morning.

Think about how your body feels when it is dehydrated...now apply that to what happens to your spirit when it gets spiritually "dehydrated."

The Lord dropped this example in my mind about this time last year. I talked about it with my brother and we had a good conversation picking apart this example. 

One doesn't have to be a doctor or a nutritional expert to know that the body suffers mightily without regular amounts of water. Body systems, brain function, skin quality and so many other aspects of the human body depend on drinking water, and a lot of it. 

We all know this. I'm not revealing something radical.

This applies to our "spiritual bodies" (a.k.a. our spirits) as well.  They too must be regularly hydrated with "living water." 

Do we hydrate our spirits adequately? Do we know when our spirits are thirsty? Can we tell before it's too late that our spirits have become dehydrated?

Our physical bodies are noisy, constantly announcing its need for food, drink, sleep, etc. 

Our spirit is much quieter, and sometimes cannot be heard over the annoying clamor of the body. 

Knowing this, we must be proactive to take in the water of God's word. (If you're thirsty, you are already somewhat dehydrated). We would never intentionally deprive our bodies of water.  We should be far more worried about cutting off the flow of Living Water to our spirits. 

Read that Scripture one more time. Listen to that podcast. Drink some water! To start with, check out John 4:1-15 and Isaiah 55:1-2. 

One more thought.

It doesn't cost to quench your thirst or hunger for God. He gives spiritual drink and food freely- without cost. 

Isn't that refreshing?