This Post is For You

This post is for you if Mothers' Day is...well...not what it should be. Not what it could be. Not what it was before.

Maybe you don't have a Mom to celebrate with here on Earth. To you, I say you are loved. And I am sorry. It's okay to not be okay. Each year will feel different as you grow and heal. But your family is by your side, growing and healing with you. You are not alone.

Maybe you would like to be a Mom, but for whatever reason, life has not begun inside you. To you, I say you are loved and I pray that God surrounds you with an extra measure of grace this weekend. Do not lose heart, dear one. Do not lose heart.

Maybe you are a Mom, a mom to angel babies that you never held in your arms, but will forever hold in your heart. To you, I say you are loved and are still a mom, even though you may not be changing diapers or struggling to load your brood into the car. Your babies experienced so much love in the short time they were here on earth.

Maybe you are a Mom in the waiting to a precious treasure. A little one is coming to you, a little one that someone else brought into the world, but can't walk with anymore. To you I say you are loved, and I pray endurance for you for the road ahead and that your home will be blessed with love and laughter in the years to come.

Maybe you are a Mom and have a Mom, but there are hurts. Hurts that sometimes feel too deep to overcome. To you,  I say you are loved, and I pray time and mercy would do their work in your life.

To all Moms, you are loved. You are appreciated. You are treasured and valued. We are what we are today because of you. In whatever way you need, I pray your day is beautiful.

Beautiful like you.

God Knows When You Sigh

A little something I wrote in October of 2010.

God knows when you sigh…and when you cry.

He knows if it was a gut-wrenching sob over a loved one that was taken from you. He knows if they were tears of joy.

He sees also if it’s a heart that is tearing in two that produces silent tears that trickle slowly down your face. He knows the deep longings that echo with soundless voices in your spirit. Longings that you cannot yourself voice.

He sees your shoulders sag and your eyes gaze off in the distance even though you smile and put on the “right” face when you talk with people. Longings that no one else knows about.

Tears hidden from the world. He sees them all.

And he keeps track of them.

That speaks of an incredibly intimate God. I have a hard time opening up to people. Up to a certain point, I’m friendly and open, but once certain lines are crossed, I shut the door. It is hard to trust myself to other people. But God is already there, already “nearer than breathing, nearer than hands in feet." (from Streams in the Desert, May 29 entry) Wow! You can’t get much closer than that!

There is relief in knowing that God knows the content and extent of my longings and desires. It is wonderful to be known. Open up your heart today to the Shepherd, to your Lover- and be known fully.

“…for the Lord has heard the sound of my weeping.” Psalm 6:8

“O Lord, all my longing is before you; my sighing is not hidden from you.” Psalm 38:9

“For he knows the secrets of the heart.” Psalm 44:21

“You have kept count of my tossings; put my tears in your bottle. Are they not in your book?” Psalm 56:8

“Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your heart before him…” Psalm 62:8

“But truly God has listened; he has attended to the voice of my prayer.” Psalm 66:19

“For he satisfies the longing soul, and the hungry soul he fills with good things.” Psalm 107:9

“For I will satisfy the weary soul, and every languishing soul I will replenish.” Jeremiah 31:25

In Review, Part 2

4. Above is a journal entry from Sept. 26 and this decision of mine had a tangible impact on my semester. The past 16 weeks were truly the most peaceful and least stressed I have had since I started college. While there are many assignments, deadlines, projects and schedules to keep straight in a semester, it doesn't have to all be painful. I just told myself I was not going to get stressed, that my God is a more-than-capable helper and off we went. He met my needs every step of the way! It is a daily choice to lay down stress. Also, as Christians, it does not make us better, cooler or more elite to be super-stressed and busy all the time.  The peace that "passes all understanding" should visibly be resting over our lives as Christians.

3. "We have this as a sure and steadfast ANCHOR of the soul, a hope that enters into the inner place behind the curtain." ---Hebrews 6:19

This is my necklace that a lot of you have most likely seen me wear. It was given to me by a friend at a significant time in my life. Earlier in the summer, I started thinking about goals and scriptures to focus on for my senior year. I usually take time to do that before each school year and at the beginning of each new calendar year. I was reading through Hebrews at the time and my spirit latched on to the above verse. An anchor. I could hardly think of a more appealing object. An anchor doesn't move and it doesn't waver. It's job is to keep a ship in place and that is what God is for our souls. Little did I know that this scripture and the anchor symbol was to become far more important than I could imagine...

2. My Grandpa Ken (my mom's dad) died suddenly on Wednesday, July 6, 2011. His death has been the toughest personal loss, within remembering, that I have had to live with. For once in my life, I did not know what to do with myself in the days following that awful morning in July. My brother Taylor and I were the main ones that spoke briefly at his graveside service the following Monday morning. I didn't think that I could do it. I kept thinking, I shouldn't have to do this. It was years too early.
   And yet, I made it through that day. We all did. And I didn't just "make it," I literally felt lifted up on wings that flew me above the natural grief, pain and never-ending questions and into supernatural peace and comfort. Though I didn't openly talk about this event on my Twitter and Facebook accounts, many of you did contact me personally and I knew I was surrounded by prayers upon prayers. I felt them. I needed them. I am forever grateful for them.
   Less than two weeks after his death, I was picking out a new journal at Mardel's when I saw the above card in a box of greeting cards. Its sweet image and simple message immediately spoke to me.
  "Today is no match for you and God." God has proved this truth over and over to me since that Wednesday in July and I hope you realize He is ready and eager to prove the same thing in your life.