Broken Bow Anniversary Getaway

When I was looking through pics for another blog post, I realized I had never posted any pics really of our anniversary getaway in November. It was the perfect weekend to be in Broken Bow!

A Year in Photos

Our first year of marriage in photos!

Year 1, Lesson 5

Lesson #5: It takes more effort to stay mad, than to actually resolve the issue. 

This one is easier said than done because sometimes you feel like you have a such darn good tootin' reason to be fired up. Maybe so, but it takes a lot of effort to be offended and  to stay offended. With everything else life has to offer, I'm learning that maybe I don't want to waste time on being offended. That mindset doesn't help anyone and it sure doesn't benefit you.

It is a choice, but make the choice to not stay angry and offended. Life's too short for that.

Love,

The Hannis

Year 1, Lesson 4

Lesson #4: Don't speak ill of your spouse, especially in front of other people. 

This was one of the most surprising things I discovered in our first year of marriage. It saddens me to see spouses bash each other in front of their friends. Not only is it more common than I would've thought, it is accepted...no almost expected to bash the "stupid" husbands or demean the "ball-and-chain" wives.

Frankly, that is dumb.
Maybe I'm still a starry-eyed newlywed, but that's not a healthy pattern, nor is it biblical. If you keep complaining about your spouse, that makes you part of the problem. C'mon peeps! Words have consequences and we know the Bible spares no expense on instructing us on the power of our words...
One of Clark Whitten's podcasts I heard even before we got engaged talked about the danger of "uncovering" your spouse in public, that is tearing them down in front of other people.

Choose to not do that. Choose to paint a different picture of marriage to a painfully confused society.

Linking this back to yesterday's lesson, maybe better words about your spouse have to start with better thoughts about your spouse.

Year 1, Lesson 3

Lesson #3: Assume the best about each other. 

I read this in one of our marriage books shortly before the wedding and it's a powerful guideline to live by. This seems to solve the other five percent of problems! Truly, in the majority of circumstances, your spouse isn't out to "get you." It's a subtle knee-jerk reaction to assume the worst when there has been a misunderstanding, but isn't it tiring to live like that? 

Especially for Christian couples: if you married your spouse in good conscience that this was who God had for you, why would you assume the worst about them?
We are still flawed human beings. That isn't going to change this side of heaven. But our life follows our words (and thoughts!), so what if our first reaction when something negative happens is to tell ourselves "Well, this wasn't what I was expecting to happen, but I trust their heart toward me," how might our relationships improve?

Communication (ahhhh there it is again!) and working through a misunderstanding may still need to happen, but how much healthier would our attitudes be toward our spouses?



Miss Lesson 1? Click here!
Didn't catch Lesson 2? Click here!

Year 1, Lesson 2

Lesson #2: "The greatest barrier to communication is assuming that it took place." 

What?! He can't read my mind?! 

Earth-shattering, right? But so true. This isn't late-breaking news or anything, but sometimes we make things so complicated! 

Keeping healthy communication lines open truly helps to solve a majority of problems. Just because you love someone and live under the same roof doesn't mean you can read each other's minds. 

I have to constantly remind myself that if something bothers me, I have to be a grown-up and use appropriate words to communicate that. 

If I appreciate something that someone has done, I also have to use appropriate words to communicate that. 

It's a constant process...a constant refining of how we communicate with each other and those around us- nothing wrong with that! 

Guess what...I can't read his mind either...

Year 1, Lesson 1

Nearly 365 days have passed since we became Mr. and Mrs. Hanni.

The year has flown by, and yet it feels like we've been married for years already (in a good way!)

This week, I thought I would share some favorite moments and lessons learned over our first year of marriage.

Lesson #1: A dish is not a "meal" unless it has meat. Unless the dish is being served past 9:00 p.m., lighter fares are then accepted as a "meal." This may not seem like a big deal to you, but it is BIG DEAL to someone-ahem Kurtis-who shall remain nameless.

First grocery list!

Grocery shopping and dishwashing can get old, so I try to not focus too much on the "un-fun" aspects of the job, but instead on the giddy grin of my husband when he and I try a new dish or sit down to a favorite.

That never gets old!

A Noteworthy Year: Twenty Twelve

A blinking cursor.

A big white square. That's what's facing me right now as I grasp for words to outline the past 12 months.

But blankness is certainly not what lies behind:

Lunch at Vast

Among many other things...
College graduation.
Best friend's engagement.
My engagement.
Best friend's wedding.
First devotions published
My wedding.
Also throw in a honeymoon, church change, new house, and new part-time job at TriCorps.

Fullness. Newness. Growth. Dreams reaching maturity and blossoming in my hands.

Numerous words have already been spoken on each of these amazing milestones; I am only left with a humble and grateful heart.

I am married to the most incredible man (for his end of the year blog post, click here) and blessed beyond belief to be his wife. My jobs right now are awesome, fulfilling and challenging- and very different from each other!

I have a beautiful home I get to decorate and fix up with my husband.

We both have excellent families that we get to live life with. I could go on...

Tear off that calendar page

What now? What is God speaking to me to focus on for 2013?

The words that keeps resonating in my spirit are: hungry, learn, grow.

Hungry for more of God.
Thirsty to learn.
Eager to grow.

I've been filled to the brim and even overflowing this year, but in an odd way, that makes me realize I do need God more and more every day so I can constantly learn, I can constantly grow, and I constantly bless and influence those around me. That gives me an appetite for God he promises to satisfy. (Matt. 5:6)

What words are echoing in your soul as you close your eyes on 2012 and open them to 2013?

"For he satisfies the longing soul, and the hungry soul he fills with good things." Psalm 107:9

Happy New Year!