Little Brother Got Hitched

My big little brother got married on January 16 to his love Hilary. Our family has been friends with their family going on five years now and I am in awe of how God brought Taylor and Hilary together. It's an amazing story.

Much love, Mr. and Mrs. Maloy. Your day was perfect :)

The gents

LifeChurch Edmond (formerly MetroChurch) My parents were married here 29 years ago.
Special to be back here for another family marriage!

Mr. and Mrs. J. Taylor Maloy!

Grandma Mitsu enjoying the sparklers!

Year 2

I started drafting a few posts like last year to share some of the lessons Kurtis and I have learned over our second year of marriage. There were some clever lines, a few cute pictures, but it wasn't gelling.

I've even read back through last year's posts and thought "Wow, I thought I was being so cute and original..." But really, it feels like I know nothing at times!

A lot of events have transpired this year (as I know they have for many families), even more so in the last couple of weeks. And while there were some incredibly painful moments, they have helped to crystallize who we are in the Lord and who we want to be as a couple.

Everybody, I would hope, has that moment. Not unsimilar to the moment when you make your faith your own, you have to OWN your marriage at some point.

2004 was the year I really made my walk with the Lord MY walk. I was a freshman in high school, and in that school year, my dad lost his job, my great-grandfather died and both my grandmas moved. That year indeed marked the end of a chapter in our family, but the beginning to so many others. I learned to sink my roots deep into God that year.

Via Google

So here I am 10 years later learning in a new way how to sink my roots even deeper into God, deeper into marriage with the most amazing man.

At a concert at church a couple of weeks ago, the lead singer made this comment in regards to his walk with the Lord, "I haven't arrived yet, but I've certainly left."

Amen to that.

Arrived? No. Further on the journey from where we started? Yes.

I could type up lots of words about random stories from this past year, but frankly, that's not what's on my heart and mind.

What I do want to say is that heading into year 3, I am more excited than ever to roll up my sleeves and dig into life with Kurtis W. Hanni. I am more than excited to focus on being, than doing.

And as our heart has been from the beginning of our relationship, to the song at our wedding, to today: may we daily choose to put Christ at the center of our lives.

Via Google

Love, 

The Hannis

Click here for more pics from our trip!

Broken Bow Anniversary Getaway

When I was looking through pics for another blog post, I realized I had never posted any pics really of our anniversary getaway in November. It was the perfect weekend to be in Broken Bow!

A Year in Photos

Our first year of marriage in photos!

Year 1, Lesson 5

Lesson #5: It takes more effort to stay mad, than to actually resolve the issue. 

This one is easier said than done because sometimes you feel like you have a such darn good tootin' reason to be fired up. Maybe so, but it takes a lot of effort to be offended and  to stay offended. With everything else life has to offer, I'm learning that maybe I don't want to waste time on being offended. That mindset doesn't help anyone and it sure doesn't benefit you.

It is a choice, but make the choice to not stay angry and offended. Life's too short for that.

Love,

The Hannis

Year 1, Lesson 4

Lesson #4: Don't speak ill of your spouse, especially in front of other people. 

This was one of the most surprising things I discovered in our first year of marriage. It saddens me to see spouses bash each other in front of their friends. Not only is it more common than I would've thought, it is accepted...no almost expected to bash the "stupid" husbands or demean the "ball-and-chain" wives.

Frankly, that is dumb.
Maybe I'm still a starry-eyed newlywed, but that's not a healthy pattern, nor is it biblical. If you keep complaining about your spouse, that makes you part of the problem. C'mon peeps! Words have consequences and we know the Bible spares no expense on instructing us on the power of our words...
One of Clark Whitten's podcasts I heard even before we got engaged talked about the danger of "uncovering" your spouse in public, that is tearing them down in front of other people.

Choose to not do that. Choose to paint a different picture of marriage to a painfully confused society.

Linking this back to yesterday's lesson, maybe better words about your spouse have to start with better thoughts about your spouse.

Year 1, Lesson 3

Lesson #3: Assume the best about each other. 

I read this in one of our marriage books shortly before the wedding and it's a powerful guideline to live by. This seems to solve the other five percent of problems! Truly, in the majority of circumstances, your spouse isn't out to "get you." It's a subtle knee-jerk reaction to assume the worst when there has been a misunderstanding, but isn't it tiring to live like that? 

Especially for Christian couples: if you married your spouse in good conscience that this was who God had for you, why would you assume the worst about them?
We are still flawed human beings. That isn't going to change this side of heaven. But our life follows our words (and thoughts!), so what if our first reaction when something negative happens is to tell ourselves "Well, this wasn't what I was expecting to happen, but I trust their heart toward me," how might our relationships improve?

Communication (ahhhh there it is again!) and working through a misunderstanding may still need to happen, but how much healthier would our attitudes be toward our spouses?



Miss Lesson 1? Click here!
Didn't catch Lesson 2? Click here!

Year 1, Lesson 2

Lesson #2: "The greatest barrier to communication is assuming that it took place." 

What?! He can't read my mind?! 

Earth-shattering, right? But so true. This isn't late-breaking news or anything, but sometimes we make things so complicated! 

Keeping healthy communication lines open truly helps to solve a majority of problems. Just because you love someone and live under the same roof doesn't mean you can read each other's minds. 

I have to constantly remind myself that if something bothers me, I have to be a grown-up and use appropriate words to communicate that. 

If I appreciate something that someone has done, I also have to use appropriate words to communicate that. 

It's a constant process...a constant refining of how we communicate with each other and those around us- nothing wrong with that! 

Guess what...I can't read his mind either...

Year 1, Lesson 1

Nearly 365 days have passed since we became Mr. and Mrs. Hanni.

The year has flown by, and yet it feels like we've been married for years already (in a good way!)

This week, I thought I would share some favorite moments and lessons learned over our first year of marriage.

Lesson #1: A dish is not a "meal" unless it has meat. Unless the dish is being served past 9:00 p.m., lighter fares are then accepted as a "meal." This may not seem like a big deal to you, but it is BIG DEAL to someone-ahem Kurtis-who shall remain nameless.

First grocery list!

Grocery shopping and dishwashing can get old, so I try to not focus too much on the "un-fun" aspects of the job, but instead on the giddy grin of my husband when he and I try a new dish or sit down to a favorite.

That never gets old!

The Sweet Aroma of Simplicity

I never was the girl who was constantly "whipping something up in the kitchen."

I just wasn't. I showed my creativity through dance, mainly. But I could definitely follow a recipe and get good results. I could plan a meal, purchase the ingredients and make it happen. I also knew that if boys were involved, they needed at least 2 servings allotted to them.

So upon entering marriage, I wasn't starting from square one...exactly.

Things I've Learned:
1. If there is meat somewhere in the meal, my man is happy. Simple enough but...

2. I don't usually know what cut of meat I actually need. (Remember, I would be happy eating chicken every day). I'm getting better though...

3. If I don't go to the store, food doesn't magically appear in the fridge and pantry. There's no thinking "Oh, I'll just wait until..." Nope. Be a big girl and get to the store....

4. Keep things simple.This is true in food prep and cooking, and life in general!

From Pinterest

I'd thought I'd post some recipes that I have had great success with (and are Kurtis approved!)

And they all have the sweet aroma of simplicity.

NOT DESSERTS

The Best BBQ Beef: Click here

Delicious Italian Beef

My mom gave me this seasoning packet and I loved the results! She said she got it at Crest in MWC- I have yet to pick some more up, but here is what the packet looked like:

From louieseasoning.com

Hawaiian Meatballs: Click here

Note: I omitted the green peppers. I also served this up with Jasmine rice and it was super yummy! 

DESSERTS

Yummy Yummy Chocolate Chip Cookies: Click here

Snickerdoodle Bread: Click here

Peanut Butter Cookies: Click here

Happy Cooking! 

Are You Happy With Now?

What if you were completely satisfied with this moment right now?

I started thinking last night how much of our time and energy is spent in anticipation of:

the weekend
next month
November 3 (Oh wait, I think that's just me...)
a different season
freshman year
senior year
another year
another time
another place.

There is nothing inherently wrong with this kind of thinking; anticipation can be good. Planning is necessary.

But are you able to set all that aside as needed and be genuinely satisfied with the present?

If yes, great. You don't have to finish reading this post.
If not, let's chat a bit more.

Truthfully, I'm preaching to myself right now. Truthfully, I am living in GREAT anticipation for that November 3 date when my fiance and I will finally be man and wife, and there is nothing wrong with that. Truthfully, I did not expect it to be so hard to be satisfied with my here and now, and that struggle is refining me.

So I go back to God's Word. Psalm 118:24 says, "THIS is the day that the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it."

I cannot dismiss the utter gift that right now is, because it will never happen again. There is much to do, much to say, much to listen to, much to be each day. Jim Elliot once said, "Wherever you are, be all there." Be all here. In this day. THIS day. Not 2 weeks from now. Not next month. Not 2 months from now. Not 5 years from now.


 I encourage you all, as I am firmly encouraging myself, to finish drinking all now has to offer before moving on to...

...whatever's next.

"Let not our longing slay our appetite for living."

--- Jim Elliot



7-19-11

One year ago today, I asked God for something rather specific.

This request is written on a piece of wood and is from a sermon that our church does every year. It represents "staking your claim" in God's promises and is a visual representation of what you have asked God for in faith. (Another story behind this...ask me some other time!)

So here I was. I was getting ready to start my senior year. I was going back to teaching. I was in a very good place in my relationship with the Lord. I was really happy with where I was in life. But I wanted to ask God this one thing...

There was no one I was interested in at the time and I was looking at finishing school in just nine short months. In my mind, it was a reasonable request that I at least meet the man who I would marry and begin to build a friendship that would eventually turn into something more. If that still wasn't in God's timing for this year, then ok. At least I'd asked. And of course I had been praying about who I would marry for years, thinking about qualities that I desired, and actually praying FOR whoever that man would be.

But this time, it just felt different.

Anyway, back to 7-19-11....

About two weeks from that day, my friend Claire Myers told me about "this guy" from her church. (Also another crazy story in and of itself!)

Then on 8-18-11, I met Kurtis Hanni for the first time at the Starbucks by dance.

Then one month from that first meeting, we were dating.

Then nine months later, we got engaged.

So here I am a year later, planning a wedding and preparing to become a wife to the most loving, intelligent, God-fearing, funny, handsome man I have EVER met.  

I am thrilled beyond words.

Yet I managed to find a few for this post :)

I share this because I am always encouraged when I hear or read about God answering prayers and working in the lives of fellow believers. My story...our story!... isn't a formula or a blueprint, but yet another piece of unique evidence of a faithful God.

And He is so very faithful...goodness...I can hardly articulate it.

"...no eye has seen, nor ear heard, nor the heart of man imagined, what God has prepared for those who love Him."

1 Cor. 2:9